woah.

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Asinine
Let's see... how should I explain this...?

Okay, IDP (don't worry about what it stands for at this point) is like falcon. You know what a falcon is, right? Falcons are beautiful (unless you're one of the few people who doesn't like the look of a falcon, but most do) birds of prey. They are bold and exciting--but elusive to most.

Sure, some folks will say that falcons are dirty or smelly. But those folks don't understand the rugged, natural beauty of a falcon. In the right hands, a falcon is a magnificent creature capable of bringing great joy to its handler. No one is quite sure if the falcon enjoys being handled. But frankly, no one cares. The falcon is there for the falconer's enjoyment--though most falconers convince themselves that the falcon is enjoying every minute of the... falconing.

Are you with me so far?

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Asinine
Now, falcons can bite you, so you gotta be careful. You see, it's all about the falcon and the falconer respecting and trusting each other. But it's a delicate, tempermental trust. You piss off the falcon just once and it could take months, ney, years before that trust is rebuilt. So if you want to keep the falcon from biting you (or s***ting all over you for that matter), you've got to be gentle with the falcon... at least at first.

The first step is to find a falcon you can train--a falcon who is willing to perch on your leather-clad hand while you preen it, caress it, and prepare it for flight. You can't just find a random falcon in the woods and be all like, "Jump on my hand! Now fetch me a song bird! Fly, bitch! Fly!" No, that never works. Nor can you expect a tamed falcon to be a skilled falconing bird. Many a forelorn falconer has spent years taming a falcon for hard-core falconing action only to find that it would do nothing more than sit in the cage and eat, get plump, and make a lot of noise.

Only after one has sufficiently tamed, and trainined a falcon through patience and dilligent effort can one go falconing with any degree of success.

A word of warning, though! Sometimes one will find a falcon, and in the course of trying to tame it, find that the bird is already trained! In fact, the falcon may very well in fact be so skilling in the ways, that its expertise outstrips the falconer's! This is a sure sign that the falcon has had many trainers. You may ask yourself, "Why would those other trainers not have held tightly to the well-trained bird?" The answer is actually quite simple. The bird is bat-s*** crazy, and has been set free by previous trainers who would rather train a new bird than deal with this one. In this case, the pre-trained falcon is simply showing off its falconing skills in the hopes of catching a gullible falconer off-guard and finding an easy home.

I didn't lose you, did I?

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Asinine
Okay, so at this point let's assume you've found a falcon, tamed the falcon, trained the falcon, and gotten all the falconing equipment (e.g., gloves, hoods, cleaning supplies), and you're ready to go falconing. There are lots of instructional videos out there that you can watch to see how others do it. Be aware, however, that those folks are pros and make it look easy. The falcons have probably been training for years, and the falconers are working with the very best equipment. You falconing experience wont be like that, but it will still be very enjoyable if you don't hold yourself to their standards.

As a side note, it is illegal to train a falcon before it has reached a certain age. The reasoning is that it would endanger the population if people starting talking falcons out of the wild before they had matured. A good rule of thumb is that a falcon is of age once it's feathers have come in nice and thick. Peach fuzz will not do, and the Game Warden will nail you for it!

Okay, so it's time to go falconing. Take it easy at first. Only send the bird out a little at first before you recall it. Over time, the bird will become more relaxed and you can send it out much further and for longer periods of time. Once the falcon indicates that its tired or worn out, it's time to stop. Continuing is grounds for a bite, and you'd have no one to blame but yourself. After you're done, clean your falcon. Some prefer to clean themselves, but it's nice to at least try to clean the falcon as a show of appreciation. Although you can never really completely clean a wild animal like that.

Which brings me to another note. Even if you have an awesome falcon, you may find yourself wanting to go falconing with another bird. Bad idea! Remember how I said you can never really clean the falcon? Well, the same holds true for you! You will smell like falcon after falconing. If you go falconing with another bird, your falcon will smell it on you, and that too is grounds for a biting. You'd be lucky to hold onto your bird if you pull that crap.

Still with me, I hope? Are you even listening???

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Asinine
Now, falconry can be performed in a great variety of ways: standing, sitting, crouching, lying down, etc. The only limit is your imagination, flexibility, and willingness to get pooped on by the bird. There is no wrong way to go falconing--though some people will tell you there is no right way either.

As Fish mentioned, falconry requires almost complete concentration, and as such it is a bad idea to mix falconing with other activities such as driving, drinking hot beverages, or playing board games.

There are also the long-term realities of falconing. The sad fact is that falcons are only good for a finite period of time. As they age, they lose the willingness, strength, and pliability to do much falconing. Maybe on your birthday, sure, but it wont be like it was in the beginning. And frankly, that's probably a good thing. After a while your falcon will probably discolor, develop skin conditions, etc. At that point it may be best to just put the bird away and play with the cat.

So, I hope that helped.

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heymagic
Speaks fluent Brazilian with a slight Cherman accent.....

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Cosworth

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heymagic
Speaks fluent Brazilian with a slight Cherman accent.....

Fluent brazillian? Whats that? Portuguese but with a g-string bikini and dancing lambada?